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Branding guru slams Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’s latest moves

DUSSELDORF, GERMANY – SEPTEMBER 16: Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex and Meghan, Duchess of Sussex are seen during the closing ceremony of the Invictus Games Düsseldorf 2023 at Merkur Spiel-Arena on September 16, 2023 in Duesseldorf, Germany. (Photo by Joshua Sammer/Getty Images)

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Welcome to The Scoop — the ultimate back-to-the-office water cooler cheat sheet, your go-to source for all things everyone really wants to know! Get the latest on everything from the political swamp maneuvering in D.C. to Hollywood drama to jaw-dropping small-town shenanigans from Paula Froelich. Subscribe to her newsletter here. 

(NewsNation) — Meghan Markle and Prince Harry have announced their latest — and last — video efforts for Netflix. It’s a bit of a last-ditch effort for the duo, who were paid $100 million by the streamer for five offerings. But, the only one that has been successful so far is their tell-all “Harry and Meghan,” which forever drove a wedge between the couple and the Royal family after they dished details and claimed bullying, royal racism, and more.

But since then, nothing has hit. Harry’s docuseries on his Invictus Games was such a flop that ABC had to pick up the last one, and Meghan’s children’s series “Pearl” was dropped.

Now, they have announced their last-ditch efforts. For Meghan, it will be a “curated” show that “celebrates the joys of cooking, gardening, entertaining, and friendship.” Or, to put it more succinctly: A marketing tool for her new brand, American Riviera Orchard. For Harry, it’s a look at the elite game of polo. Yawn.

But, I’m not the only one unimpressed.

Doug Zarkin, an award-winning branding expert and author of “Moving Your Brand Out of the Friend Zone,” is decidedly nonplussed about both offerings, especially regarding the jam Markle sent out to elite influencers last week to “quietly promote” her new site.

“Let’s dissect this logic, shall we?” Zarkin laughed. “Is there truly a void in the jelly market that only Meghan Markle, of all people, can fill? Pitching quasi-royal jelly as the flagship product for Meghan’s brand is like trying to pass off a PB&J sandwich as haute cuisine.

“Meghan’s foray into the jelly market raises eyebrows and questions about the strategic direction of her brand. Is this an audacious attempt to disrupt the culinary world, or simply a misstep in Meghan’s quest for reinvention? Is Meghan Markle really the jelly mogul we never knew we needed, or is this just a royal-sized PR stunt gone awry?”

 As for Harry? Zarkin is just as acerbic.

“Prince Harry’s upcoming Netflix series delving into the world of professional polo could serve to satisfy the general public’s (i.e. the “regular people”) (interest) about this exclusive world. Polo, with its luxurious and mysterious aura, naturally draws interest, but the real question is: what really is the inside scoop? If the series manages to infuse a hint of the ‘Real Housewives’ vibe, offering a glimpse into the drama and dynamics of this elite world, it could indeed attract impressive viewership.”

However, Harry has made it abundantly clear he is not interested in the tabloid underbelly of anything, least of all his favorite sport — of which there are plenty of scandals. When that much money and indulgence is involved, there always are. Instead, Harry’s show will likely be an earnest “God this is so tough!” look at a sport only billionaires can afford. Yay.

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