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‘I don’t want to raise by fear’: Eva Mendes on breaking generational yelling

(NewsNation) — A celebrity mom is shining light on a topic that may be all too familiar for parents — generational yelling.

Actress Eva Mendes opened up about trying to break the “generational yelling” cycle as she navigates raising her two daughters.


“My mother was so loving and so amazing, but it was raising us by fear,” Mendez said. “I hope I’m not going to look back in 20 years and go, ‘Oh shoot, I did that,’ because I really don’t want to raise by fear.”

Mendez said raising kids by fear is not fair to them and that she wants to change that.

In an effort to learn more, Mendez joined clinical psychologist Dr. Shefali Tsabary to discuss parenting strategies and how she could learn to break generational patterns of trauma.

Tsabary, the host of the “Parenting and You” podcast, teaches conscious parenting and how to break generational patterns of trauma, including cultural yelling which Mendez admitted she finds herself doing.

“Every single week, I’m helping parent after parent break the generational pattern of trauma, and I always encourage parents to realize that they can be,” Tsabary said.

She continued, “Yelling is such a common family pattern, it seems like it is the parent being in charge and in control, but really it’s a fear-based response because the parent is feeling out of control.”

On NewsNation’s “Morning in America,” Tsabary shared a little bit about her conversation with Mendez and why she encourages parents not to yell at their children, explaining how it’ll affect the child in the long run.

The best way to tackle this is to learn how to regulate oneself because they weren’t taught how to regulate themselves as kids, Tsabary said

The first step is awareness, that you are now caught in a pattern. The second step is to learn techniques like mindfulness and breathing.